Pushed into separating yourself from places or people can create a harsh feeling of fear. It’s a negative change for each of us. It’s not the norm. This past year of Covid-19 has been a quick change to everyone’s lives, and we don’t like it! I can remember when a little alone time or down time was welcomed and often much needed. I’m talking about an hour for yourself, or a weekend away, taking a week’s vacation. But a 12-month quarantine, now that is more than any of us asked for, but it came and we had to handle it without any prior experience. I found with me, that I went through phrases, at first, thinking it would not last that long, I used the time to catch up on things. Once caught up, I used the time to try new things. Our family started a weekly online house party night, I did a 1000-piece puzzle, I spent time in the kitchen cooking things I had never tried before, and many of them, I will never try again. As time went on and the true state of isolation as I had never known before set in, it was onto another phase. This was the hardest one for me — the longest phase to date. I was lonely. I missed my kids and my grandkids. I missed my friends. Heck, I missed everything. I was sad, truly sad. That was a personal change that caused me even more fear. What is happening? I’ve been sad many times in my life, but this was different. I missed smiling and having people smiling back , and I missed the loss of companionship and touch. These emotions left me with a void, an empty space in my heart and soul along with a lot of time to think about being sad. So not knowing what else to do, but driven to stay mentally healthy, I began to unpack my life, to examine all the little things. It was as if I was wearing a Fitbit and the Fitbit was keeping track of every thought that came into my head. Good or bad, these thoughts were clearer and more precise than thoughts I was used to having. They were thoughts of my memories, my regrets, and my future plans. They seemed to stay with me until I was done with them. This was the first time that I realized I was capable of totally free thought. I was not clouded or preoccupied by anything because nothing was going on. The business of life was still. No doubt the virus has been a terrible thing for all of us, and I certainly don’t give positive credit for any reason . I have to believe though that the secondary result of this length of isolation has given us an opportunity to have a free mind. To realize what’s important, and clear out any clutter of thoughts not needed. So my wish and hopeful prediction is that when Covid is over, we will emerge mentally healthier than ever before, recharged and ready to over the top enjoy all that we know we clearly and precisely missed. Put trust in goodness and go calmly on your way.
Love to all of you.
Sue Powell